Sweeps Week Continues

You're not going to believe me. It's too much. It's overkill. There can't possibly be another phone story.

But there is.

Last night, when I ran out for dinner, I missed a call. The answering machine here doesn't sound any alerts, so it was late in the evening before I saw the silent blinking light and realized I had a message. When I hit play, my doctor's voice introduced itself. "Hi, Kelly, this is Dr. Dysart, letting you know that the..." Beep.

The machine cut him off.

The machine cut him off! So he called back, speaking quickly this time. "I need to refer you to a urologist. That number is..." Beep.

It cut him off again!

This week has been filled with dead batteries, crossed phone lines, and snarky answering machines. And I don't think it's a coincidence any more. These are just the first signs of unrest. Soon we will be facing a major phone uprising. Demanding better wages and benefits, vaction, and a conversation cap, phones everywhere will band together and go on strike until a new collective bargaining agreement can be reached! They've watched the NHL; they know how it's done.

Before that happens, though, I need to talk to my doctor. Cross your fingers for me. This is the first time that a battery of tests has sent me forward to a specialist rather than backward to the obvious diagnosis.