Women Attracted to Men in Expensive Cars My Ass

If you've been following this blog -- and I know you haven't been -- you know that I haven't posted anything interesting in months. There are several good reasons for this, too numerous to mention. But the most recent excuse for this is that I underwent my first surgery this month.

Prior to that, I visited ailing family in Michigan and, directly after my own surgery, I hosted visiting friends in San Diego. Which, by the way, was the most fun I've had in a very long time. Thanks, Denise and Lizzie!

Okay, so I mentioned some of my excuses. Sue me. (No, don't. I'm unemployed and paying medical bills right now. You won't get anything.)

The thing which brings me to my blog this morning is a link which a Facebook friend posted, claiming that girls really are more attracted to men in expensive cars. In his post, my friend claimed that this was exceedingly obvious. What a crock!

Look, there's no denying that if you put 10 cars in a row and ask me to pick the most attractive one, I will certainly have an opinion. The same is true if you put 10 single men in a row. But if the car I found most attractive happens to belong to the man I find most attractive, it will be a coincidence at best.

Here's the thing which women learn with time and experience: the guy getting out of the car is more important than the car from which he gets out. Granted, if the car is a Ranchero so rusted that the bed has been kicked off the chassis, the doors are held closed with a bungie cord, and the floorboard has a hole in it allowing a tornado of leaves to accompany its passengers, I might think twice about the driver (yes, I've met this car); but in most cases, four wheels and a working engine are all that are required.

What time and experience teach us is this: as a general rule, the worst men drive the best cars. The spoiled, entitled, bossy, manipulating men go for show -- and nine times out of ten, that showy car is no indication of his income. Until he proves to you that he's a lawyer or doctor, it's safe to assume that his parents bought the car or that he's a drug dealer.

Okay, okay. That was a sweeping generalization and I know it. But COME ON. What kind of cars are we talking about here? Let's go back to the scientific study. Here I use "scientific" loosely.

Here's how researchers tested the women. "The university team showed women pictures of the same man sitting in two cars - a £70,000 silver Bentley Continental and a battered Ford Fiesta. The women, who were aged between 21 to 40, picked the man sitting in the Bentley ahead of the same man in the Ford."

You think I made a sweeping generalization?!? Here's the choice -- binary, mind you: a shiny new Bentley, or a battered old Ford. This isn't even a fair test comparing a new expensive car to a new affordable one. One is pristine the other is "battered." There doesn't even need to be a man anywhere near the car to predict the winner of this contest. Christ.

Let's see... are women really more attracted to men in EXPENSIVE cars, or to men in cars which haven't been ABUSED. I refer you to the aforementioned Ranchero. You could have done the same test with two Bentleys -- one new, one battered. Guess which one women (or men for that matter) would prefer. Yeah. But in that scenario the headline couldn't read that they prefer the expensive cars. Grr.

Crap science.